To win a test match you need to take 20 wickets.

He won't contribute much at all.

So who's in for the long haul then???

fucking pointless!!!!

whats Giles gonna bring to the team? dollys?

duncan fletcher, what have you done? :(

I heart that man.

won the toss and are batting.

i used some cream to get rid.

I just wish we'd won the toss.

Come on Harmison!

We produce the most exciting spinner we've had in 20 years then refuse to play him. What a bunch of dicks.

Harmison is off after two overs. Anderson's first ball goes for four. It's not looking good so far.

Steve Harmison. He seems to have so little self-belief. Frankly, I don't think we can afford to have him in the side anymore. He comes up with one good spell a series. It's nowhere near good enough.

A wicket! Bout time.

1130: WICKET Australia 79-1 (Hayden 21)
Flintoff makes the breakthrough, Hayden edging him to Collingwood at second slip. Flintoff goes ruddy beserk - at least he's up for it. Skipper Ponting strides to the middle. He looks more and more like George W Bush this boy.

Flintoff being heroic aside, that was a bit crap. Harmison is not just inaccurate but worse than that he's bowling consistently far too short to both Ponting and Langer. Hoggard and Anderson look eminently unthreatening because the ball's not swinging, and that one over from Giles didn't exactly fill me with confidence. I cannot imagine what Fletcher was thinking, I really can't.

...England strike. I sat through the whole of the first session and the only highlight comes when the Sky Sports Hamster in Nottingham has stopped running around its wheel. Shit.

Miserabli 321-8
dr_phonetics 378-6 dec
thewarn 340-4
Pigfoot (ME!) 330ao (Eng 25-1)
Stranded1871 323-5
devonmalcolm 302-7
snow_brigade 250-5
OceanStorm 315-5

It's tea. 217-3. At the moment, I would say the smart money is with thewarn, Stranded1871 and OceanStorm. Hopefully Miserabli if we're lucky.

Also, first post in two hours. Everyone is dead. I killed them. You will be next.

...did anyone see the Shane Warne Advance Hair Studios advert between a few overs?

'I think this ones for you Warney'

what?! worst/best advert ever!