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What the coolest thing you own?

no votes
?
by stabby3

Mine is my Get Cape presentation disc. I literally want to bum it.

What's the coolest thing you own?

stabby3 | 27 Feb '07, 10:12 | Send note | Report this | Reply

cool ?

nothing !
valuable ?
The safety EP...


Pigfoot.

my slave portfolio really needs some work :'(


I can do cool!


Love Buzz 7"


The World

Its mine.
All mine!


a vibrator?


I have the Dive 7"

but that's not as cool


I know the least cool thing I own

is an official Nintendo Wii carry case.

That or a Be Here Now box set.


a be here now boxset?

what's in that?
is each tracked mixed out with additional guitar solos until it fills an entire CD?


don't

get me started on Be Here Now


a lot of old transistor radios

lots of crystal port decanters
old things in multiples, generally.


A rubber centurions helmet

A builders helmet
A policeman's helmet
'Betty' by Helmet
A signed picture of Helmut Kohl


^^^^^^

thread ruiner


^^^^^^

Helmet


Telephone call from Mr Pot for you 'meths'

wants to speak to Mr Kettle? Something about a colour...


is it

pol pot?


Yes

Wanting to speak to John Kettley. I misheard his original request. Sorry, wrong thread!


The Ultimate Ric Flair Collection on dvd

9 hours of 'The Nature Boy'


cool ?

Are you sure ?


yes


Snes

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah


red leather studded cowboy boots

if I could marry them, I would. I may get married IN them.


I dunno.

A big plastic arse?
Two smashed/mended cheap flying V copies?
Giant brilliant computer?
collection of vintage woven 60's square end ties?


Im intrigued by your big plastic A**e

John. I need to know more about it.


It is a womans hip / pelvis / arse area

from the top of the thigh to the narrowest point of the waist. I found it while working at a clothes shop clearing a loft - it used to be used to display knickers I'd imagine. I also found a white hand which would have been used to model gloves or jewellry, but I unfortunately smashed all the fingers off it using it to "play" a heating duct at a recent Junkplanet gig.


existential = my mind

material = my sword


Its not japanese

so that would be inappropriate, I have my own tao.


Dunno really.

About six years ago it would have been Queen Of The Troubled Teens on 7", but as Idlewild have become more mediocre over the years it's kind of lost its cool status.

Perhaps my guitar (US Telecaster)


The guitar

or the single?


the single


Hmm

I'm still holding out hope that Idlewild DO eventually become the new REM, and then I can sell it for millions of pounds.

I'll keep you posted though.


okay

I'll look you up when they become the new Wet Wet Wet


Hot Snakes poster

signed by Speedo.


That IS cool!


Probably the prawns in my freezer

How lateral of me


HE'S A CRAB!

I KNEW it.


Look like crabs

Talk like people


need to take care lest

their shells are literally/laterally misinterpreted and loaded into slack howitzers


no not lateral

literal


my house

how very colateral of me


It is both lateral and literal

And I can prove it in a court of law.


using the geneva conventions?

ALL OF THEM?


*applause*

You can now be upgraded to "human being"!


*laberal


Ta mate!

How local of me


I'll buy it off you.

Do you accept paperclips as currency?


I'd need change.

Possibly in old copies of Street Fighter 2.


heh


:(


NO!

NO! NO!

See: Rule 16(2)(a) of "Heh" (which stipulates that "'heh' can used to illustrate a level of agreement through the insinuation of humour being found within the preceding statement.")


I saw a van

number plate somethingorother HEH this morning, i was going to photo it but was scared of the points police


Oh.

Well that's good then. Last time I saw it being used was to batter IndieAndy_Jones into a spiralling column of depression.


That's Rule 19

"Can be used as a tool of a derisive nature if placed
(1) after a preceding statement to which it bears no direct relevance; or
(2) after a preceding statement which contains a distinct lack of wit or correct grammer and/or spelling; or
(3) after a preceding statement by any of the following people:
(a) zxcvbnm
(b) IndieAndy_Jones
(c) Theo-GB


"


*grammar

These Rules were clearly not proof-read. Stupid Rule makers...


heh


And here we see Rule 19(2) in demonstration!

Thank you, you complete and utter bastard.


Oh I didnt realise that celebrety stuff was cool

in that case, I'll trump you with a pair of simon le bon's smalls


midget circus

with dwarf animals


a signed platinum disc

of 'Dial Tone Heart' by Junkplanet.

not really. I do own one of these though:

http://www.genesis-publications.com/books/bowie/


WAIT!

I have Bobby Charltons autograph. that is cool :)


did he sign yer boo.....

abandon reply

(whilst dual interpretation is still possible)


NO.


I own

loads of cool things, like my car, black, fast, noisy, smelly, air conditioned foot spa, it rules!


good for getting your women to A&E when they've had one

of their "accidents"?

heh.


Is there

a rule about self-'heh'ing? I demand action be taken against this verbose internet jester.


You've lost me

Do not pass GO. Do not collect £200.


Oh right. Now I see.

There isn't a Rule but "self heh-ing" is implied as being "legal" in the preamble:

"Heh is a versatile linguistic tool. WITH HILARIOUS CONSEQUENCES!"


hah! <in the mrs craboble style)

Is wai superior


heh

^^ That's Rule 2. Synopsis: mocking disagreement.


I've gone off you

I thought you were vegetarian soup, but your not, you have crustacians


er... my accordian?

or maybe my old 1960s 3piece tweed suit
or maybe my two 1960s german fabric-shade lamps
actually, none of these are very cool are they? ah well, they are for me.


maybe the suit is cool

pix of you wearing it please


I win

with my mighty SLEDGEHAMMER = coolest boy thing ever


A tape

of an hour long interview with Robert Fisk.

Well, I think it's cool...





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