At the gig last week, a singer, prior to a song, mentioned that thing about levels of friendship.
That is, level 1 is an aquaintance, level 2 is a friend, level 3 is a partner - admittedly all that's a precis - and level 4 is a special relationship with another person, partner or otherwise.
Have any of you ever attained level 4 with anyone? - family is not allowed to be considered.
Maybe
Is there really any way of telling for sure though?
You'd know if you were there
I guess
How?
You may be mistaken
Relationships are always a one-sided thing, though
You might find they have the same feelings for you but I think if you feel you're at that level with someone then that's what you have, even if they only consider they have a level 2 relationship with you or something.
Also
that seems like some of the Greek classifications of different types of love.
They had some interesting theories about all that stuff. And I'm not talking about bumming slave boys.
And what's wrong with slave boys?
Their bums are too slack
from all the bummings that they received.
I've not got as far as level 1
Me and JacobJones are on level 4.
He understands me.
LOLZO
etc
Are you the end of level boss?
If I just work out your movement patter, I'm pretty sure I'll be able to make it to level 2.
You janken?
Me chain
yeah.
I got Lvl 4 with Cloud. Omnislash fucking owns. All those hours in the battle arena were worth it.
isn't level 4 being in love then?
so yes, twice.
I think it's supposed to be stronger than that
Could you be in love with someone with whom you did not have a relatioship?
nope
if you've never had a relationship with someone, it tends to be more obsession than love, in my view.
No
My question was rhetorical
You first post concentrated on trying to find a relationship with someone that is beyond a partner but still with a partner. A level 4 relationship relationship is not necessarily with a partner
oh, then no
I've never felt closer to anyone than I have to a partner.
Fair enough
but that doesn't disclude you from the topic in question
agreed
i've had this kind of relationship with two or three people. not easily classifiable as love, though can be confusing enough that you might mistake it as such.
what i mean by that
is a kind of 'understanding'... something unspoken, the sense that there's something very intense and matchless there. but to paint it as love/best friendship, or even to try to connect it to physical attraction, could be wildly inaccurate or trite.
not in love but you can love them
my best friend Paul and I have like a family love - we've been best friends since we were 4 and I love him as if he were my brother.
what do you mean by 'special relationship'?
like, another type altogether?
Perhaps an ex boyfriend?
A 'fuck buddy'?
Someone that leans on you as a crutch?
Someone you take out once a week who is 80 because they can't get out themselves on their own anymore?
Someone you drive around to the doctors clinics who is weak because they have HIV?
Define 'special'?
No
None of that
soul mate then, perhaps?
??
Stronger
Obviously
your answer to my question is "No"
No - I've had variations of those relationships
before.. I still don't understand what you mean by 'special' and so can't answer your question.
I mean
stronger, more meaningful, and much more
If you can't surmise what I mean
then your answer is "No"
oh ffs
wuteva
^5
What in shitting hell
are you talking about?
I think it's clear
Rose has gone off a tangent which demonstrates no knowledge of the topic
Pedantry about "special"
whether intended or otherwise, clearly shows a lack of perception of the topic
that is such a load of rubbish, Traynor...
how the hell would you know about my life and who I've had connection with, either level 1 through to 4?
I haven't heard the term before... so don't sit there and profess to know about what I do and don't know - you forget I'm 32 and not 18 on this board, and have been around the world and block quite a few times.
I used a cheat, but it bugged the game
I think so
but ask me again in a few years, I'm too young to know
I think the bottom line is the singer in question
is over-simplifying things and attempting to categorise human relationships in a way that just doesn't work.
So any answer I or anyone else gives it utterly irrelevant.
It wasn't his idea
That doesn't make him any less wrong.
I mean to say...
relationships with other people (sexual or otherwise) tend to be very complex and ever-shifting things that just cannot be defined easily - often even words like "friend", "girlfriend", "partner", "acquaitance", "fuck buddy" etc. are over-simple words used in an attempt to simply define your relatinship with someone but often, if you really questioned about how you felt about that person, a far more complicated and difficult to define picture would emerge.
To suggest you can define all relationships easily and attach a set of numbers to them is utter bullshit. Even if you do have a clear idea if someone is a friend or a partner it doesn't necessarily tell the whole story. Some people are closer to their friends than ther partners, for example.
Whoever orginated it, this theory the singer espoused is simply incorrect and the kind of "everything's easy to explain, the world's a simple place" gibberish that frankly pisses me off.
"easy to explain"
Fair point, but the levels are a philosophical categorisation that is open to investigation and debate.
I know what you mean.
But I'm not sure. I've had friendships that have bordered on it. And a relationship just now that is maybe three and a quarter so far...
i've got loads of level 4's,
if i understadn you correctly
thinking about it,
i've got at least 10 if not more.
if i understand you correctly
Out of interest
is anyone that replies to this thread going to be 'right' in your eyes, Traynor?
This same question applies to every thread you've ever started.
My joke about final fantasy 7 was the most correct possible answer.
Alex Kidd>Final Fantasy
dont be ridiculous
I like things to be kept simple though
I'd like to be able to meet new people and immediately think 'you're no no. 4 but you may be a no. 3.5'. If level 3 is a partner and level 4 is a special relationship, I can only take from this that either 1) they're dating people who aren't special or no. 4 is actually on some kind of fucked up spiritual level. I'll leave that kind of shit to Sting, thanks very much.
Surely
you don't think that a boyfriend is the ultimate relationship that you can have?
Indeed not
often, in fact I have better conversations with myself. I give me a 4.
Out of ten?
Biatch
Put that point with brainlove's below
.
Yes.
Definitely.
Where you feel *almost* like half of a single entity, and when you look at them, it's like looking in a mirror, they're so familiar in all aspects.
Rare, and dangerous.
.
You see yourself through their eyes
maybe. i'm not really sure.
I repeat
that I reckon no-one could ever be sure.
dont tell that to traynor
Maybe
Maybe not
You can.
I'm not down with the levels thing, because it's more of a continuing spectrum in my mind, but some relationships are clearly beyond the everyday variety. And he's right: you can tell very easily.
I don't have friends.
It's level 0 relationship.
You've got the one thng they can never take away from you
Potential.
I think I've got a level 4 friend, but I didn't realise it for a long time. She's a keeper.
potential ?
me ?
LOL
I'm pretty sure I have a level 4 at the moment
Better release some scanner balls into that fucker
so we can measure the shape of it and see how it moves on the inside.
i'm just gonna interject summit here,
its a little bit related. no doubt Mr T will say i'm wrong but:
the beatles used to say things to people as if they were one enterty and often reply to questions put to them as individuals with replies saying, "we think this" or "we feel that", i.e. when the singer out of the byrds asked george harrison, "do you beleive in god?", he replied with, "we havent worked that one out yet", or the first time they got stoned, paul mccartney said to someone, "its as if we [the beatles] are up there, on the celeing, looking down on everybody".
is this that sort of relationship you're talking about? does it even make sense?
this is my longest post ever.
fuck is my mixtape, etc.
That is a valid contribution
Yeah, amazing life changing relationships don't have to be sexual, of course.
did i spell celeing right?
i didnt did i?
oh smeewee
ceiling.
also,
a semi ^5 from traynor.
i'm going for a massive wank
can level 4 relationships end?
Only if you defeat the end of level boss
yes, I think that particular quip may have worn itself out
They can reach an end that is compatible
with the relationship itself, in the sense that the end is inevitable and fits into the relationship without disturbing it.
or
they can just stop exhibiting the qualities that make them a level 4.
they downgrade. it's very sad.
If that is the case then either,
my explanation is valid, or it was never level 4
Sounds more like a 3-2 transition to me.
4 is pretty unshakable, even if you end up disliking, hating or ostensibly indifferent to the person in question on an everyday level, it's still there.
i dunno.
when 3 is a partner, and the person concerned isn't in any way, shape or form, a partner, but you feel at least as close to them [and intensely about them, albeit not sexually] as if you were partners... in my head, that = what we're calling level 4.
obviously i'm describing a situation i've experienced here
and the person involved was interested in me, but i didn't reciprocate. but i felt more intensely close to, and protective of them, than anyone else in my life at that time, despite us having apparently little in common. i struggled to define that friendship and this seems like it fits it pretty well. but now, that connection is nearly all gone.
That seems valid
I think
it must be understood that the sequential numbering of the levels is merely a labelling. (3 is not necessarily "better" than 2.) The rise from 2 to 4 is the same as the rise from 3 to 4.
Nah.
A good friend who fancies you?
I think what JDT's getting at kind of transcends that kind of stuff.
this was a little different to that
been in that situation before, and it was just that. this... there was something about it. intense is the only word i can conjure to describe it. it was a real 'you & me vs the rest of existence' kind of friendship. i like all my friends but couldn't honestly purport to love them - love describes an intensity of feeling, and that was there with this person, even though i could never, ever have considered going beyond the platonic there. yknow that awful, trite phrase 'i love you but i'm not in love with you?' it was like that, if that phrase could ever actually carry any sincerity.
Sincerity
Yes it can.
It would be incorrect of anyone to suggest 'being in love with' is greater than 'loving ' someone. It may be it may not.
sure, of course it can
my side point is that it rarely does. it's one of those dreary phrases that gets used when it really isn't the case. people break up, and one tells the other they still 'love' them, just 'not like that' - when often, they don't still love them. they care about them, but are relieved to get out of the relationship, and may very well lose touch with them before long, with little regret.