"Dear Tenants
We have received yet again a very serious complaint regarding illegal parties within the above address. [this was sent to everyone in the building, not just me - i've not had a party in a year!]
The landlord will no longer tolerate the misuse of his property that has been reported to us in the last few weeks.
There has been a new intercom system and CCTV installed. We have also renovated the common parts so you can have a clean and safe environments for our tenants. [the new hallway decor is ugly and cheap-looking. and we don't appear to have a central fire alarm system]
However, the intercom system has been ripped out three times, the front door and frame has been "kicked in" damaging the locks and framework. This has happened twice.
Your guests kindly urinated in the common parts (every party)(great company you keep) and cigarettes being stamped out and left.
All of the above is violating your tenancy and also the rights of other tenants.
This behaviour will not be tolerated. If you have booked a party for your address, cancel it now or you will be in violation of your tenancy. If any further complaints are received, we will seek legal action to recover costs of damage and we will request you to leave."
Fair enough and a bit of a relief really - although the noise hasn't much bothered me, the mess has and the intercom not working is a real pain. However! Today I was gonna send out an invitation to everyone for our christmas party! Haven't thrown one in a whole year, but they were always lots of fun, if a bit debauched and coked up to the eye balls. My guests and sundry others never caused any damage, though there was litter left which we (me and my housemates) would clean up (more or less).
I might ask my landlord if it's okay we have a party, if we hire a cleaner for the communal areas the next day and agree to pay for any damages sustained that evening... hopefully he'll go for it..? My flat is perfect for parties - well, everyone's is which is partly why this building has more than its fair share.
Tell us of your nightmare neighbours / landlords / flatmates!!
you nearly got to the end
without mentioning coke, so close.
:)
Me, vikram, partying without my landlords consent?
With MY reputation??
...
One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where he lived and decided that he wanted a change. So he set out on a journey through the forests and hills. He climbed over rocks and under vines and kept going until he reached a river.
The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. He couldn't see any way across. So he ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that he might have to turn back.
Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.
"Hellooo Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"
"Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you wont try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.
"Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"
Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. "What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!"
"This is true," agreed the scorpion, "But then I wouldn't be able to get to the other side of the river!"
"Alright then...how do I know you wont just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?" said the frog.
"Ahh...," crooned the scorpion, "Because you see, once you've taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!"
So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.
Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.
"You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"
The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drownings frog's back.
"I could not help myself. It is my nature."
^is on coke right now
I've heard this story before
Obviously its a pretty old, well known story but I'm sure I remember it from a film or tV program. Any ideas?
aesop i think
...
The fable's premise is the basis of the plot of the Star Trek: Voyager episode "Scorpion", in which Chakotay describes the fable to Captain Janeway as a warning not to trust the Borg. A fox is substituted for the frog.
This story is also told by Orson Welles in the film Mr. Arkadin (also known as Confidential Report, 1955) and by Forrest Whitaker in the film The Crying Game (1992). An altered version of the story is also told by a native character in Natural Born Killers. It is referenced by James Gandolfini's character during a season 2 episode of The Sopranos, by John Glover's character during a season 1 episode of Smallville, and Lorelai Gilmore (Lauren Graham) in Gilmore Girls during season 6. The fable is referenced multiple times in season two of the Showtime series Weeds (2005-2006) as a metaphor for the relationship between a widowed drug dealer and Drug Enforcement Administration agent. It also appears in the 1989 Blake Edwards film Skin Deep, and in an episode of CSI ("Burked").
This story was also told and depicted several times in the Japanese animation Eden's Bowy.
This fable is also the subject of the song "Scorpion" by the band Megadeth on the album The System has Failed.
This story is also the inspiration for the song "Scorpion Frog" by the Israeli band Infected Mushroom, as this story is sometimes used as an anecdote in discussions concerning the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.
It may well be Natural Born Killers
Cheers
It's from
The Crying Game.
So, what are you saying?
You're a scorpion?
Or you can't stop getting coked up?
I don't get it.
who knows
who cares
point
wut?
^read my mind.
Parties destroyed my last student house
Good times
Hmmm
I'm glad my frieds don't piss all over my place
you'll never survive in London's trendy Hoxton district with that attitude.
call me picky
but urine has its place, and it's not on the floor
You a golden showers man then?
are you asking me out?
Are you outing me?
are you inning me?
If you buy me dinner first
not MY friends!
To many to mention
- however, had I known that all you have to do to get CCTV installed is to have wee and litter in the hallway, I'd have hired a tramp a long time ago to sort it out for me.
Sounds like a charming place you're living in Vikram.
And no, I don't think he'd go for it.
I also doubt it's a breach of your lease. Although it may say something about noise levels after 11pm.
there's usually a clause
in all tenant agreements about criminal activity on the premises. playing loud music after 11 is a breach of the peace.
I don't think that parties can be 'illegal'
If you ask your landlord, say you wanted to have a 'soiree' or a dinner party. Say that it is invitation only and imply that numbers will be limited, also the idea of paying for reparation should help.
Does it say in your contract that you cant have a party? In which case how many people is considered a party?
i dunno
but we'd be talking like 100 people til 6am. but for th first time in what will be thirteen months!
no fair! stupid neighbours!
oh
well then just check your tenancy agreement/contract, if it says anything about parties or gatherings over a certain number then your stuffed.
Otherwise you could only get evicted if your party had antisocial consequences or criminal actvity.
Oh, your stuffed either way.
my favourite was
sometime this summer. my oh-so-middle-class dinner-party-having neighbours in vauxhall were had a number of loud parties in their back garden over the summer. they'd have people round and sit outside drinking and talking loudly until the wee small hours. it usually didn't bother me, i'm good at sleeping through such things.
however one day over the summer, i was awoken at about 3am by the neighbours upstairs playing bluegrass music really loudly. i was kinda half awake, when i realised that the neighbours and their guests were all talking in french.
the effect of two together, coupled with being in and out of conciousness, was a bit like being at a really surreal festival.
what's wrong with dinner parties!
i'm having one in two weeks! dinner parties are ace!
where did
i say there was anything wrong with them?!?!
whats for dinner?
it's thanksgiving
so roast turkey and stuffing and mash potato and cranberry sauce and lots more
(i'm not american, but thanksgiving has become a tradition for me now)
I had a party at my house
we havent had one since though we are slowly planning to phase one a couple smaller ones in, the first one was rushed and noth thought out at all and attracted around 300 people...
I say go for it, ask the landlord if under certain circumstances you were allowed one, IE public holiday & come up with an agreement with terms & conditions.
don't tell him anything...
he'll say no.
read through your tenancy agreement... i doubt that having a party is violating your tenancy.
just try and keep it within your four walls and try not to disturb the others. and clean up the mess.
see my point
above about criminal activity. lets hope his landlord doesnt see this thread eh? coke.
i covered the loud music in my post.
the coke is something he wouldn't know about.
i read your post
but i couldnt understand your accent
just sounded like orinoco flow but angrier.
cocksucker
the landlord doesnt give a fuck about drugs
it's just the damage really, and mess
That's the troubpe with skins parties.
Do much damage.
Not sure but...
most tenanancies will have a clause not to cause any undue noise, disturbance, annoyance or nuisance to the landlord or any neighbouring property.
I think this is what the landlord would argue what covenant the party came under....
well there's no way the neighbours won't hear the noise
maybe i could check with everyone in the building first, to see if they are okay with it. gah, this is ridiculous! it's one neighbour in particular, who has the odious friends. he's a prick too.
Devise an elaborate scheme
by which all your other neighbours believe they've won tickets to a Hollywood movie premeiere that evening
in my house in forest fields once
I had a banging headache for about a week.
after the landlord finally agreed to send a plumber round, the gas fire in my room was immediately condemned.
Yup - carbon monoxide poisoning - lucky escape there!
we
had this last year (well not the banging headaches) but the boiler was shit and didn't work and we had to keep constantly relight every 5 minutes if we wanted water.
The landlord sent over his 'odd job guy' ie his mate dave. To 'fix' it. All he did was take off the casing and then complained about the mess (only to our landlord not to us) and left, anyway a few weeks after a real guy came round and said the gas fire was a death trap...
shit houses huh.
*hot
water, we had water :D
Just don't encourage people
to jump on your bed.
Where's the fun in that?
You'll need to buy a new bed
as I did last month after thinking telling everyone to leap on my bed whilst listening to 'I Should be So Lucky' was a good idea.
please tell me there's a vid up on youtube
sadly not
though there is this photo
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=641123&op=1&o=all&view=all&subj=655890663&id=605170481
i can't see that for some reason
My sister had a party recently
and her neighbour knew her landlord and rather than ask her to turn the noise down, she requsted the landlord to cut the electricity. Cunt.
In my student house we had a party
and our neighbour complained and we got a letter from the council.
This story is pulled out of the mire by the fact that our neighbour was Frank Skinner
I got a letter from my landlord. The other day.
I opened and read it, it said:
"Dear Suckers
We have received yet again a very serious complaint regarding illegal parties within the above address.
The landlord will no longer tolerate the misuse of his property that has been reported to us in the last few weeks.
There has been a new intercom system and CCTV installed. We have also renovated the common parts so you can have a clean and safe environments for our tenants. [the new hallway decor is ugly and cheap-looking. and we don't appear to have a central fire alarm system]
However, the intercom system has been ripped out three times, the front door and frame has been "kicked in" damaging the locks and framework. This has happened twice.
Your guests kindly urinated in the common parts (every party)(great company you keep) and cigarettes being stamped out and left.
All of the above is violating your tenancy and also the rights of other tenants.
This behaviour will not be tolerated. If you have booked a party for your address, cancel it now or you will be in violation of your tenancy. If any further complaints are received, we will seek legal action to recover costs of damage and we will request you to leave."
Picture me given a damn - I said never!
Here is a man that never gave a damn
About a party with me and some scenesters
I wasnt with it, but just that very minute...
It occured to me
The suckers had authority!
Coke-sweatin as I dwell in my cell...
please finish the song
tricky!
oh, vikram
That post hurts, doesn't it?
This thread has given me much LOLz!
Vikram...like seriously dude. 100 people in a flat? JESUS!
What makes these flats so perfect for parties? And how big is this fucker.
But seriously. You're fucked if you tell the landlord and you're fucked if you don't.
i've been to parties with 300+ in a flat
in hackney.
granted the place was massive.
my place is fairly large
i'd post up pics, but i'd get flamed
Why?
Do you have a kiddie dungeon in you dining room?
how did you know?
I'd say it's a big "no"
Sounds like your co-dwellers have ruined it for everyone...
Move.
THIS SUCKS! :(
Convince your co-dwellers to hold the party for you and see what happens
Or maybe convince your co-dwellers to have a party and see what happens
You are lucky.
A couple of my freidns get complaints to the landlord from their neighbours for getting up too early (6am ish).
We got a notice in our kitchen today
saying something like:
"Dear students,
this kitchen has been left in an UNACCEPTABLE CONDITION and the cleaner will not be cleaning again until it is rectified."
Fair enough, it has all gone a bit Withnail & I in there but considering the cleaner does fuck all anyway it got me quite annoyed.
Where do you live?
It might of been mentioned but I scanned the thread.
Sounds similar to a friend who regular parties until the wee hours at his flat (Whitehcapel). Luckily though, everyone in this modern block is the same and they get away with it.
hoxton
most people in this block are the same way i suppose, and noise isn't really an issue if it's the weekend. but the damage is - having to go down three floors to open the door cuz some cunt broke the intercom is annoying. i didn't notice the urine, but if people have been pissing - ffs! and this is hardly a cheap building (not that piss in the lifts of council blocks are any more acceptable)
Please
learn to reply in the right place?