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Brand your town!

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by _vikram

"Up here it's different"

There was an article in the Independent today about city branding. A lot of you will scoff, but it can do wonders - Barcelona is the classic example of a place that used to be known a rough and nasty that is now much beloved. Part of that is marketing the city exceptionally well.

Britain has been less successful and some of the city / town slogans chosen have been truly dire and a big waste of money.

London's is "LondON" - truly awful.

Leeds went with "Live it. Love it." - stolen from Hong Kong.

The US has a few good ones. Vegas's is the best ever: "What Happens Here, Stays Here" but my favourite is Hershey, Pensylvannia's "The Sweetest Place on Earth".

Anyway, do a comedy slogan for your town!

_vikram | 04 Dec '07, 18:13 | Send note | Report this | Reply

Glas-gofuckyerself,yaprick

quite apt


He he..

Good one.


Ha

Peterborough: 'A city to surprise and delight you'

took the words right out of my mouth


Yate's slogan is

'Something for Everyone'

what a fucking lie that is....


Bromsgrove:

Where brummies go to die.


hahahahaha


...

My friend refers to Bury St. Edmunds as Bury St. Deadmunds from time to time. Decent effort...


sadly

my province's slogan used to be "friendly manitoba" and then they changed it to "spirited energy"...wtf!!!???


How about sWINdon or swindON

You cant polish a turd

:(


or FTWinchester

Hungerford - Oh come on, it was like 20 years ago, ffs.


MARveLBOROUGH

Nah!


Newbury

You'd be mad to bypass us!!


Shoreditch: You can't go any lower

OoooooH - I can't copywrite now. My heads sore.

Shoreditch: Where Nu-Rave met Old Wave.

Shoreditch: Life's a bitch.

Shoreditch: Sure thing.

Shoreditch: Banging like a shed door in the wind since 1790.


hehe

I agree


...

Shoreditch: It's Well Brown.


Manchester

Romance, bottled, in your face.


Saaaarfend

its got arcades and shit


Cardiff

Vive Le Cardifference!

Makes no sense whatsoever. It's perfect.

PS - "you said 'brand'! you're a cunt!" etc.


Belfast - 'It's the bomb!'

Bournemouth: It won't be long now.


is Basingstoke really marketed as

Amazingstoke?


Haha!

The Amazingstoke thing is dripping in irony and was started by Hampshire piss takers.

See also Andover ('Blandover')


^^ This

extreme lol.


East Kilbride,

often called East Kilbrilliant, in an ironic way.


BristLOL


the lincolnshire one is beautiful.

oh, lincolnshire <3


Prestwick Airport motto...

'Pure Dead Brilliant'

Now, I love to hate this phrase as much as everyone else, but I reckon they should add a 'by the way' to the end and make it Glasgow's official slogan.


isn't that where that terrorost attack happened

lol if the attack had been successful

DEAD!! BRILLIANT!!


that was at Glasgow International Airport.

Prestwick is in Ayr, and nowhere near Glasgow.


I have two...

I live in Rutland but somebody beat me to it with the line I was going to use, so...

Rutland: Just like Bournemouth, but smaller.

And I'm at Uni in Sunderland...

Sunderland: Hey, at least it's not Middlesboro.


Bugger.

I was about to use that last one for Stockton-on-Tees...


lol

it's full of posh people waiting to die


I see!

Misconception though, neighbouring Poole is god's waiting room.

Bournemouth is a young persons town, way younger age profile than the rest of the UK.


They must...

all be hidden away when I go see my family there then. It's like a pensioner convention!

Poole and Bourenmouth are basically the same place though really aren't they. It's like Newcastle and Sunderland. Different places apparently, but the buildings don't stop inbetween lol. I jest.

I apologise, I shall fix my slogan haha.

for the record, Crazy Golf in the big park with the balloon is mint :)


Cheers!

Yes, Bournemouth is a bit of a crazy golf mecca, there's a good one in Boscombe too and a truly kick ass crazy golf course at Sandbanks.

I wish it was summer so they'd reopen!


edit (OMG!!1 MEGA LOLZ!!!11!)

Rutland: Just like Poole, but smaller


Street, Somerset

"no, not a road, a town, that's called street. funny, huh?"


Harrow

"You can at least see London from here"


life is for livingston

... if you like huge shopping centres hundreds of round-a-bouts and council scemes!


Don't

Just... don't.


anyone from Northamptonshire here?

Tell me your opinion of
Northamptonshire: 'Let yourself grow'


My (little) town is twinned with Tymbark in Poland

some wag put on the welcome sign

"whaley Bridge twinned with Tymbark 2"


Stanley

Stanley, Country Durham

Where obesity statistics are the only way you'd know what century we live in.

Not catchy, but true.


.

Eastbourne - Fogeys love it

Beachy Head - The worlds favourite suicide spot.


bournemouth

"it's where posh people come to die"


Chichester

You'll Never Leave!


Derby

"at least Nottingham is only 15 minutes away"


:D


.

Brambridge: Trees, horses and shit.


WOKING!!!

Where its okay to Smoke when your pregnant.


Borehamwood

'Its not that bad, honest!'


Dublin

You must be on a stag do


Epsom

Horses And Toffs. Some People Can't Tell The Difference.


Chester

Nice looking town, awful looking people.


Yeovil

Run


Chester

Its near places you dont want to live but atleast somthing happens in.


Things happen in Chester...

like..erm...errrr...

Shit.


My girlfriend's from Chorley

Apparently the town motto used to be, 'Beware!' but then they realised this might be a little off-putting, especially since they'd inscribed this on every public bin in town, so they changed it to 'Be Aware', which is perhaps the worst motto I've ever heard.

My home town's Worcester: "Just off the M5!"


:D


this was stolen from elsewhere, i must admit

can't believe more people didn't lol!


Workington:

Working Class.


Workington

At least if Sellafield goes tits up, we'll be the first ones to die.


I don't live there no more

but there's a great tagline that's often bandied about regarding Swansea.

Swansea: the graveyard of ambition.


a friend just came up with a great one:

"Tipperary - It was a long way, but now you're here."


Brumingham

"don't be put off by us just being a car-making city, we don't make cars anymore"


Derry, Northern Ireland

Home of popular 90's act D:ream

Birthplace of Nadine from Girls Aloud

A Mecca for White Lightning enthusiasts


Sutton Coldfield

'Got too much imagination?, creativity? vision? We can cure that'


amazing

I hear the rental space in that particular city centre isn't cheap either


...

Manchester: Britain's Biggest Lie
Birmingham: Britian's Second Biggest Lie


you originate from both of those non-towns?

that must have been complicated.


...

Do not defame me! I am London born and bred. Hence my antipathy and contempt for every other park of the UK.

Except Aberdeen. Aberdeen is dope.


...

P.S.

Luton: The Source Of All The Evil Contained In This And Any Other Universe.

It's unwieldy, but I think, acurate.


York:

'Tang Hall is a figment of your imagination'


I used to live in Tang Hall,

well the very edge of it, so much the edge that it pretty kmuch wasn't even Tang Hall.

I have no idea why the Tang Hall working men's club next dorr to us was in the centre of Fulford!


I had to walk through it once

It was even worse than Chapelfields.


...

It has to at least be plausible.

I suggest changing it to "Nottingham: Better Than Kandahar".


It's not only plausable but very, very true!

Almost everywhere is better than Derby.


that is why the county town of Derbyshire is:

erm ..... Matlock!