I'm making a mixtape for a friend who's really depressed because he's really shy and finds it hard to make friends.
Any suggestions? So far I have Get Him, Eat Him - Mumble Mumble and The Bees - Listening Man...
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From the Archive - Nine Inch Nail's Trent Reznor: Not the most depressed vampire anymore
Could also be
songs about being humble too...
Bjork - I Go Humble
Is this really what he needs?
Surely it'll make him dwell and wallow in his shyness? Surely a better move would be something to make him feel more confident.
I recommend Outkast's "So Fresh, So Clean". I mean I really recommend dragging him outside and forcing him to talk to people. But, failing that, I recommend Outkast's "So Fresh, So Clean".
And Ash's "World Domination"...
Keep it up beat
a bit of MC5 - Kick Out The Jams no need to dwell get him excited.
I can get like this sometimes
and I agree with theguywithnousername, both on the Outkast and outdoors ideas. A mix tape is a great gesture but maybe take him out to a gig?
Just smack him really hard
and tell him to get over himself. If he's actually a shy person then I seriously doubt he'd suddenly, at 18 years old, be feeling depressed about it- I think he would have got used to it by now. Don't give him the attention he's obviously craving.
shyness
I'm 27 and still rediculously shy and self-concious. Despite being aware of this aspect of my personality, it can be impossible to overcome and horribly inhibiting.
didnt you read that previous post?
Pull yourself together ;)
Uh, some Low, some Mogwai, some arab strap,
Thing is the older you get the more difficult it is to break out of.
18's certainly young enough that he could make the break and escape his shyness if he wants to.
But, tempting and oddly cathartic that it can be, there's absolutely nothing to be gained by him sitting depressed and moping about it.
Ultimately the only cure for shyness, difficult though it is, is to force yourself to talk to people until you break through the barrier and feel confident talking to people.
This isn't to trivialise it - it is horribily inhibiting for many people and it is a genuine problem not everyone can "just get over" and some people actually need help from psychologists - but the worst thing anyone can do is sit and dwell about how shy they are until it dominates their mind.
.
He definitely shouldn't dwell on it or be depressed by it. I'm not really sure why shyness should be something that they should have to break or escape though. I see it as quite an endearing quality to have.
It is to an extent.
But not if you're unhappy being shy, which the guy who started the thread's friend seems to be. I mean pretty much any personality trait is fine so long as having it doesn't cause you problems. But if it gets to a point where you find an aspect of yourself is making you unhappy then it makes sense to change it...
Actual shyness is not endearing
it's very difficult to deal with. However, most people who claim to be "shy" are actual just quiet people, or at least act quiet in order to look twee and have this cool shyness. Or are "awkwardly shy" in a kind of Hugh Grant way, which is absolutely sickening.
i hate it
when people who aren't shy don't understand shy people.
Most ignorant thing ever.
I'm not particularly shy anymore but i once was and people just don't understand.
Awww, I bet your parents "just didn't understand"!
And those nasty boys at school. Fuck sake.
go! team - friendship update
(you still have no friends)
The Smiths 'Ask'
^ I was just going to suggest that
I'm shy and it really infuriates me I try to overcome it but more often than not I don't :( However when I feel particularly crap about being shy and awkward dancing aroun to 'ask' makes me feel better.
all of pinkerton
most j mascis' songs
At 18 I was quite shy
but by sticking with a "fake it until you make it" policy on confidence and forcing myself in to more difficult social situations at uni I've changed a fair amount. So that is my advice for what it's worth.
ok songs
Biffy Clyro - Only one word comes to mind. "Its alright to hide away underneath the ocean.Open up, the way I have to feel right."
And maybe Romantic fatigue by Frank Turner
no not romantic fatigue
I meant a decent cup of tea, for being shy in relation to girls.
hefner - hello kitty
a song about being happy all alone
Im sure a frothy tape highlighting his short coming is
is just what he needs to cheer himself up, what a splendid idea.
Can I suggest Do It by The Rollins Band.
Also remind him he will be dead in a hundred years time so there is little time to fuck about worrying what other people think of him
cheers
Most people are fairly shy.
As long as his personal hygiene is fine, he doesn't invade peoples faces when he's talking he should be fine.
He just needs to get out. Is he going to/at uni?
Fuck the mixtape...
Get him pished and take him salsa dancing.
But for the mixtape...
Shoegaze and postrock should probably be avoided, other than the Explosions in the Sky album The Earth Is Not A Cold Dead Place. I'd go for upbeat songs that make me happy (regardless of the lyrics):
Spinto Band - Oh Mandy
Belle & Sebastian - I'm a Cuckoo
The Cure - The Lovecats
The Beach Boys - Good Vibrations
Broken Social Scene - Our Faces Split the Coast in Half
Endor - Hold On
Devendra Banhart - Santa Maria Da Feira
Fuck Buttons - Brighter Tomorrow
Guillemots - Made Up Love Song #43
I wouldn't put any Elliot Smith on there.
But seriously, fuck the mixtape.
Buy
anything by Belle & Sebastian
or
the Juno soundtrack.
:]
Whimsy xx
give him some
elliott smith, and some smack and say goodnight...