for NEVER doing this!

McD's, KFC, Harry Ramadams, some of the things they said they'd witnessed were awful, frequently involving bodily fluids. One of my friends aunties allegedly ate a tumour from a chickenburger or something once, it was a long time ago, i'm not really quite sure what happened, but the rumour was she was seriously ill and got a lot of money. The most worrying part was that most of them worked at the same place, a place where lots of us have probably been. Odds are at least one of us have had a jizzburger.

Used to have this thing when she got a fright she would burst into tears...

Anyway one night we all got take out and our guy friend went to get the order, he took a bite out of her burger and then put it back in the box. When we all sat down to eat she opened her box and promptly burst into tears.

It was one of the funniest things ever.
As for spitting etc...that is rather sick.

No, I haven't.

Footserviceindustry? Freudian? Toe-nail clippings?

Last summer we were having a bbq at my mates house and his little brother kept pissing us off asking for a burger etc, getting his mum to come have a go at us so we made him a burger and sneezed it and spat in it.

The boy was 9.

never spat in a burger, nor did i see anyone else do it.

But when I worked in an Indian restaurant, the chefs used to wash in the kitchen sinks at the end of the night before putting chicken in the same sink to defrost, which I always though was a bit grim.

I also once put a bottle made out of a deers hoof into a tub of pringles before passing them over to a vegetarian friend, she put her hand in to get some crisps and burst into tears. I was unable to console her as I was laughing too much :-(

yeah someone spat in my trainers last time I was in Office.

But if people used to complain that their soup was cold, I'd microwave it 'til it was like lava, and there are times when I'd really like to give cinema customers a drink from the fizzy drink dregs bucket.