How to ruin a perfectly good tune. First of all start off with a nice big rolling beat and a pinch of bass. Let this simmer for about half a minute until juices are flowing. The people will really be loving this.

Then add simple plucking of string instrument. This gives the piece a real far-eastern flavour and will convey feelings of Vietnam movies gone by. Then just as your public are really getting in to the tune, lay down an annoying guitar sample, stripped into snippets of what sound like interference with the faint idea that it will complement the soundscape you had previously created.

To finish do exactly the same with the other track on the single to the point where anyone listening will be thinking of checking their stereo equipment for faults. Et voila.

Now just wait for the plaudits to roll in exalting you as an 'experimental' musician. What a waste.