Tonight’s packed Boat Race gig is something of a celebration for Saffron Walden’s Houston 500, who have just inked a deal with Global Warming, signed shortly after a couple of stunning gigs at ‘In The City’. In attendance are a selection of skinheads, skaters, punks, and foreign exchange students lured by the presence of Icelandic rockers Mínus or perhaps by the chance to broaden their vocabulary thanks to a song called ‘Queen Of The Crackwhores’ (more about that later…).

First up are Mínus, who have been around for about five years and have just signed with Sony. What their paymasters are getting is a sound which veers between The Cult and QotSA, fronted by a wild looking frontman who sounds like Stuart ‘Tindersticks’ Staples. Image-wise, Mínus can’t make up their minds whether to look like Britpop refugees or a bunch of greasy rockers. It’s messy but likeable enough. One worth keeping an eye on for sure.

Image is something Houston 500 have got spot on. Their all black attire and hirsute looks reflect in their music – dark, seedy, and downright scary. So scary in fact that the Boat Race dives for cover the minute frontman Dave opens that big gob of his and screams into the mic. Either that or it’s the dose of flu he’s threatening to share with the audience.

Dave is also keen to share his love with the audience, dedicating ‘Endless’ - a song so brilliant it would make The Darkness blush - to two ageing punk rockers with the words “This is for the two special lovers sucking each other off down front.” Later he will dedicate forthcoming single ‘Queen Of The Crackwhores’ to his step mother declaring her to be “A massive fucking cunt.” We think he meant this as a term of endearment but we’re not so sure...

One thing we do know, Houston 500 deserve to be huge. They’ve got the looks, the tunes, the attitude and they rock like rampaging wildebeast. Oh and anyone who’s daft, or indeed brave enough, to release the aforementioned ‘…Crackwhores’ in the run up to Christmas deserves our praise. Buy it… or Santa gets it.